What Have I Done??

I can’t believe what I’ve done!! The constant phone calls about my debt finally got to me and, before I knew what I was doing, I was at Manchester Airport with my shiny new red and gold credit card. I booked on the first available flight, I didn’t care where it was going.

It was quite a long trip but I didn’t spend the journey thinking about what would happen when the plane landed. Instead, I watched the films, listened to music, read the in-flight magazine - I got really interested in an article on Obsessive Compulsive Disorder where people have to keep doing the same things over and over, like counting. I think the woman next to me wanted to talk but I blanked her because I didn’t know what I would say if she asked where I was going. Or why.

After the plane landed, I found the bus station and caught the first long-distance bus. I don’t know anything about the place where it’s headed. We’ve already been traveling for some time now. We’ve driven through small villages where cats looked up curiously from their perches on warm windowsills then, remembering that curiosity killed the cat, they hid their fear in sleep. Passed through cities where ravens strutted along office block rooftops and sirens screamed in the background. Up through the hills and down into the town of Altvistle where we stopped for lunch, omelettes, at the Loaf and Wheel. Then we forded the great river, Rothwyll and drove for many more miles before drawing up in a run-down bus station.

The driver told us the bus needed some maintenance which would take about two hours. I headed straight for the internet café I’d spotted on the way in. First thing I did was to send Jez this email:

Hi Jez

I’ve done a runner. Left my little flat in Manchester to start a new life in … who knows where.

What can I say? Except, of course, that I’m sorry. I just couldn’t take it any more. Even my hopes for a possible future with you were drowned by the constant pressure of being in so much debt. So, I’ve flown away. Remember, I told you about how I felt when I went for the helicopter ride over London. How I wanted to take off. Well, now I’ve done it.

Maybe my leaving won’t be too difficult for you. After all, you have your boat and you’ve started a new life too. In some ways, I wish that you could sail over here and see me, but that’s not possible is it? Narrow boats don’t travel over the sea.

Still, if you ever wanted to come and see me, when I’ve settled, maybe we can arrange it. I think, now, I might be able to afford a plane ticket for you if you want one. Just let me know.

Whatever happens, though, we must keep in touch. When I’ve found a place to stay, I’ll send you my address.

Lots of love

Toni
xxx

This café is called The Webbery and it has a giant spider’s web painted on the ceiling. I’ve just noticed that the threads of the web lead down the walls to each computer. It makes me think again about the links between us that the internet makes and it raises my hopes that I won’t lose touch with Jez. Or Brim. They’re such special people.

Now, I’m going to go for a walk around this town, whatever it’s called. Maybe I’ll buy myself some supplies, like toiletries and a spare pair of knickers. God knows what the place where I end up will be like. I hope there’s more shops than there seems to be in this dump of a town.